House Of Night
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House Of Night
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House Of Night
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A forum for the House Of Night Novels created by P.C. and Kristin Cast. Here, you can discuss each book of House Of Night and each individual characters etc. And also you can role play.
 
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Latest topics
» insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD
insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeTue Oct 01, 2013 5:04 pm by Katie-la

» Dreamer's Poetry
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» What you last did
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» finsh the sentence ( game)
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» Look Around
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» Have you ever........(game)
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» If You Could Change One Thing About Yourself
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» what are you listening to right now?
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» Last Thing You Watched
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 insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD

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5 posters
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AuthorMessage
Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeThu Jan 06, 2011 6:30 pm

Borderline

I am on one side of a big white line
The people that I've known are
Standing on the other side
They walk forward slowly
but run faster as the time goes

They are changing in front of me
But I'm stuck, rooted to my place
Rooted to here, where I've stood
Stood still for way to long and now...



Last edited by Katie-la on Sun Feb 20, 2011 7:27 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeThu Jan 06, 2011 6:35 pm

Time

I'm running out; I know it
Please turn the hourglass
Just make it stop now

Or rewind it too
Make it go back
I could fix it
I would fix it all.
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natshane
High Priestess
High Priestess
natshane


Female Join date : 2010-06-11
Location : In a deep deep hole....

Character sheet
Name: Adrianna
Age: 16
Affinity: Hobby: Writing

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeFri Jan 07, 2011 12:49 am

I love time, because one thing insurance company couldn't buy, it's time! XD
(Got that from Dear John)
I love all 'time' related poem, and even a short one like yours:) It's direct and meaningfulXD
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http://www.thetwilightsaga.com
*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeFri Jan 07, 2011 6:53 am

Cool piece of write there about time! I sure do want it to turn back. I wish I'm back again to Sec3... Starting a new syllable and in my first semester of preparation for final years. Now, I regret not working hard enough and scoring all the Bs and Cs.
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeThu Jan 20, 2011 4:54 pm

Syllabus, you mean??

And GOOD LUCK! Haha. I'm dreading high school right now.

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natshane
High Priestess
High Priestess
natshane


Female Join date : 2010-06-11
Location : In a deep deep hole....

Character sheet
Name: Adrianna
Age: 16
Affinity: Hobby: Writing

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeThu Jan 20, 2011 9:30 pm

Haha, hey katie! xD
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http://www.thetwilightsaga.com
*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSat Jan 22, 2011 12:47 am

i don't dread going to jc, but i do dread going to poly.

The point is, i don't dread going on with education, but i dread the major examinations which determine where we'll be heading to.
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

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PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSun Feb 20, 2011 3:46 pm

I completely understand that, Ger, but I love tests
Haha...If I know how to solve the questions. xD


Over-Zealous

I'll give it all I have
For this single shot
Everything I have
Every single spark

But will I truly make it
Or will I be left in the dust
Left to pick up the tiny
Minuscule pieces of my heart

I've poured blood
Sweat and tears
Into this one shot
But will my feet fail

I get anxious and jittery
I'm constantly moving about
Will all this crap work out
Or will I just drown miserably

I guess we'll see won't we ;]


Last edited by Katie-la on Sun Feb 20, 2011 7:30 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSun Feb 20, 2011 7:30 pm

OMG last stanza totally rhymed. haha just a gift. ^_^ jkjk

For It

Are you ready for me
Because I'm coming out

I'm going to shoot up
Out into the dark night

And make you think
That the sun just rose

Cover your eyes
Because I might just be too bright

xD
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSun Feb 20, 2011 7:35 pm

My mind is telling me
"Stop."

But my heart is shouting
"Go!!"

So my mind replies,
"Please stop."

Then my heart is all like,
"Umm...Why are you still not moving? Go, Silly Goose."

But my mind starts to get a bit feisty (well, almost),
"Honey, I'm getting a bit angry. Make it stop talking...Please."

And OHMIGOODNESS, that doesn't go well with my heart
...So, yeah. It basically explodes.
xD


Can that even be considered poetry? rofl

o.O And btw Heya, Nate! bahaha
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*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSun Feb 20, 2011 9:38 pm

I like the rhyme here. very smooth flow. Simple words, it's a cliche topic to talk about, but you brought it across so well. (: sweet.
talks a lot about first loves... or maybe, i should say first love, but a first REAL love.
Desperate, desperate.

Fav lines:
'I love you
I need you
I want you
To stay
But instead
The moment's over
You fade away'

So much emotions is packed within just these few lines! really the repetition of ideas in the first three lines really tugged on my heart's strings. <3 it!

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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

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PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeThu Mar 03, 2011 5:02 pm

Haha thanks, ger~!
Lemme think of some more. xD
I'm feeling confused right now so how about something along the lines of this...


When left to choose
Between Me or Them
I always choose
Them

Today I want
To Choose Me
but it seems that
I can't

It's not the right thing


Last edited by Katie-la on Sun Mar 06, 2011 8:22 pm; edited 1 time in total
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*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeFri Mar 04, 2011 3:08 am

this... really sounds like you're confused... it baffles me too. I can't seem to comprehend what you're trying to say.

'when left choose'? what did you mean by this line? i was like. W-H-A-T?

and the last line. ít's not the right thing'. i don't understand either.

it's just as confusing as you had meant it to be i suppose?
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSun Mar 06, 2011 8:28 pm

EDITED! I meant to choose. hehe

It's like you're faced with two choices.
One for you
or
One everyone else
and you know that you should probably put everyone's happiness in front of your's. But you really really don't want too.

Lemme try again.


I step hesitantly towards one
Then I quickly jump back
I look at both and I scratch my head

I go to the other one and I almost--
But no. That's not the right thing
I go back and sit on the ground.

Both of them stare.

They want me to choose.
They want me to choose badly.
I know what I want.
I know what they want.

So I go
No backward glances.

This time I make decisions for myself.
Forgetting everyone is easier than it sounds. xD


It's more like a story than a poem rofl
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*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeWed Mar 09, 2011 4:24 am

ahhhh i get it now. the picture is a lot clearer here! great! (:

well it alway starts off like that. believe me, i was like that too.

and in fact, a poem is a story... just it is the SUMMARY of the story in a flowery manner.
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

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PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeWed Mar 09, 2011 2:24 pm

I don't write very flowery. rofl
haha
Work at it!!
Okay, thanks for the input. I really appreciate it. Don't hold back, Ger!
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

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When someone you love
Or loved more like it
Looks down on you
And tells you that
You can't do it

It hurts.

THEY betrayed YOU
And now they can't believe in you
Now they smash
Your most potent dreams
When you give it your all

It makes me sick.
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*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeThu Mar 10, 2011 2:18 am

Erm this last poem. yes, i can see it's a summary, but it tells the reader how it feels, doesn't show the read how it feels. to show, you've to evoke emotions. and to do so, you'll have to describe the actions... okay, i'll use your poem as example. (i'll be taking the idea of your poem)

Quote :
When someone you love
Or loved more like it
Looks down on you
And tells you that
You can't do it

It hurts.

THEY betrayed YOU
And now they can't believe in you
Now they smash
Your most potent dreams
When you give it your all

It makes me sick.

I'd put it across in such a way:

Years and months of devotion
and love,
crushed within the fraction of
second,
when he simply put me down
and said,
You cannot make it, just
give up.

Which life did I commit
a sin,
that I am condemned to
such fate,
to suffer the grief of being
betrayed?

Yet today, I'm but taken as a
lier,
when it was I who had given
my all,
went through all the agonizing
sorrow,
and had my potent dreams
shattered.

All these mess just makes me
so sick.





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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

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OMG! Ger that was amazing.
You totally explained what I was feeling...Shew, I wish I could write like that. I was beautiful xD
You should totally look into a career involving poetry.
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*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeWed Mar 16, 2011 4:16 am

well, i wish there's such a thing, but look at all the famous poets/ artists... and all those who are literally inclined and tried to make a living out of their works... Not one was famous when they were alive... they all lived unknown, but died well-known. I don't want a life without certainty... because being a poet just doesn't get you a stable income... i'd rather be a nobody who works for a somebody to get some money.

well, thanks for the praise though! encouraging.

Believe in yourself my friend, i'm sure you can do a lot better (:
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

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Awww Sad
So sad, but so true.
I'd rather live out on the streets, pursuing my passions, then being pigeon-holed in regular job.
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*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

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PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeWed Mar 16, 2011 8:19 pm

i wish. that's all i can say. imma try being a writer... but i'm just not good at writing.
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Katie-la
Being Chosen by a Cat
Being Chosen by a Cat
Katie-la


Female Join date : 2010-10-17

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PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeSun Mar 20, 2011 3:34 pm

haha. I know the feeling.
But YOU ARE A GREAT WRITER, GER!!



Sinking

Sharp words
Floating through fragile air
The world breaks
Feeling harsh on your ears
Tears fall
You crumble

You run for the serene light at the end
Only to find the solemn darkness
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*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeFri Apr 08, 2011 9:28 pm

Keep trying. it's important to keep trying (:
I can see attempt to put in more imagery into this write.
It feels a little disjointed esp the last line. most of it flows well, just that last line. 'you crumble'. it seemed to have no tone to it... okay maybe not no tone, but rather flat and emotionless compared to the other lines. A little more explanation to your poem maybe?
yes, it's gd to have it short, but when you have too short, sometimes it just confuses and looses the readers' attention because of the ambiguity of the lines.

but the title is nice. (:
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*~Dreamer~*
Losing Two Friends
Losing Two Friends
*~Dreamer~*


Female Join date : 2009-06-16
Location : somewhere behind a computer screen ><

Character sheet
Name: Dreamer (Left); Sky (Right)
Age: 18/15
Affinity: Power Tapping and Invisibility (both)

insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 Empty
PostSubject: Re: insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD   insert.awesomitasticamongus.word.here.and.you've.got.this.thread xD - Page 2 I_icon_minitimeThu Apr 21, 2011 8:42 am

hey! update pl0x! your poetry thread has been really dead! more dead than mine!
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House Of Night :: Literature Classes - Creativity Section :: Poetry-
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