Dreamer's Poetry

Don't say that. Only when you ramble are you most sincere with your words. It's not hidden under a cloak of confusion or distant sophistication of words that cannot be comprehended. And I realize you're rather negative with yourself. Not trying to direct your life, just saying... It's not a healthy sign.

'happiness is a choice'. I've said this many times, and i learnt this from the person who walked me out of my despair. Angst is beautiful, sorrow is pretty, sadness is touching, but too many cooks spoils the broth, you'll walk yourself to an eternity if you keep locking yourself up like that, self-derogating, caging yourself in a warp of make-belief agony. It won't show, but downfall is just what you'll meet with eventually.

What is 'happiness is a choice'? It's looking at things from a different perspective? That's more like irony. I don't quite know how to explain, but this was what my friend told me:
'You saw my life. You know how it's like. It's just... like shit. Yes. like shit. But I like this shit! ahha! Bet you didn't get that.'
And like duhhhhh i didn't get it.
basically, it was just supposed to talk about acceptance. A kind of acceptance which can give you the deepest happiness, filling your empty heart. Making you complete. It's... I don't know. I still feel mellow at times, but i wasn't the me i was before. I'm more sociable now, although afraid at times to talk to people, esp of the opposite gender. I don't know why, but it's just like that. I feel weird talking to people of the opposite gender. Okay, not over the net, but face to face. I just can't bring myself to talk to them face to face. Just... just weird!

and what's there to pity me about? Yes I'm disappointed, but at least I'm happy that I can take it off me. Even if it was just a mere fraction of a second, but at least it served its purpose of giving me the happiness I desire. At that fraction of a second if i do feel complete and whole, then I'm happy. And that happiness, is something which can on many occasions become the well of happiness in which you draw your energy to smile and stay happy from. It's weird. But I've that urge to tear a few days back because of all that i've suppressed. But after posting it up, i felt slightly better. And i couldn't tear anymore because i'd realized i could feel a tingling sense of happiness. It's not the normal inane happiness we have when we chat and laugh with friends. those are external. It's a kind of feeling... err.... feeling.... feelling.... ah! Blissful. Yes. Blissful. That's the word. You feel xing4 fu2? Even though if you know your life is a load of crap shit mess trash rubbish, but somehow, just oddly. somehow, you're able to really smile from the deepest end of your heart. and you don't fee that pain weighing you down.

Anyway, even if you continue to persist that you're rambling whenever you type something about your own emotions, go ahead. I won't stop you lol. Just remember, this thread is free for you to crap (:
I'll always be over HERE, in front of my computer, ASAP to read your comments.
It's okay if it doesn't 'answer' the 'question' (which is reviewing the poems), just so long you're able to feel better, that's all that matters. Just don't worry so much about whether you're rambling or not dear, just ramble on. It's fine with me (: I used to ramble so much more! If you don't know, I have pen friends and i email them mails that are more than a thousand word long! Not exaggerating. It's just the average length. Not now anymore though, because i don't have the time to write that much.

I wrote this for a mini poetry competition on poetsanctury. Of course, it's as quiet as my poetry thread over at the main HoN site. Always getting ignored. Ahha, but there's nothing to feel sorry for me for (:

I am happy regardless because I get to write. And to write and be able to read what I write is all that matters, because Others Don't Matter.

Vagabond

Watch me as I walk away,
moving on to tomorrow,
leaving all my marred history
in this place I used to love.

Because I am now alone,
with another world
to begin a brand new life.

See me take my every step,
heading towards my future,
where you won't be there
to hinder my path to success.

Because I am now alone,
with no one to stop me
from reaching the stars.

Hear my courageous voice,
resonating through the keys,
of the future piano
in which I can leap through time.

Because I am now a free man,
without the barriers
to constraint my every move.

Because I am now a free man,
bearing these wings of courage
with which I can soar into the sky--

Unafraid of the aloneness.
~Ger.

(theme: Alone)
A/N: By chance, this could be what is meant by 'happiness is a choice'? Whereby it is also not a bitter irony?


>> Instrument

Just a little quote to add:
A picture speaks a thousand words, but a poem speaks a million memories.

A/N: This poem was supposed to be a poem made up of words from a list given. (every word has to be from that list). I only managed to follow through until the fourth line. Thus I've failed that contest. anyway, what I've said is just to clear your qualms about why the idea seems so disconnected.

>> Fluid

ahhh... How I miss those days of holidays!!! Everyone was so active!!

But nevermind! After O lvl and SPM (for nate), it will be time for us to celebrate! ><

Late reply, I know.
Just came back from CNY holiday and it was okay, I fell sick for the whole week though.

Desperation
You repeated the words 'Others do matter' but how is it connected with desperation? Personally, I like the toning, the flow, the meaning of the poem, but it contradicts to the title, or is it just me?
I was feeling a bit desperate today, I was feeling ansty as well.

Because the person is desperate for some love? Okay i was just depressed that my thread at the main HoN site is so dead. No one ever bothers to leave even a one liner >> I feel like I'm just hearing the echoes of my own voice. Even though I wrote another about 'others don't matter', but it does actually, because they help boost your confidence.

I can see your point >< Don't you think that's it's getting quieter? By the way, how do you do the chinese writing? Jay Chou ;D

it's part of the computer writing. just add it through the control panel/ languages.

it's okay that it's quiet, so long we are still here, it's fine.

starting a new story. (please check and give feedbacks)

I only have like one paragraph of it up currently. I'll add more when i have the time.

Busy with schoolwork again? Haha, same here.

You got that right:)

btw, just digressing a little,
I LOVE JAY CHOU <333
Just check jay chou on en.wikipedia.org.
he's just so ZOMGWTFWTHWTS completely imbalanced /jaw drops/
He knows a myriad of instruments and WTH???!! he even has his own genre!!! WTH WTH WTH WTH

okay, those WTHs are there because i just find it too pro!!! and i wish i can be like that toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

[ story completed! ]

Ai Kia Si

Unless you're looking
for a faster way to die,
please look carefully
at the neon signs
that is everywhere,
for death in such a way
isn't at all a glory sight.

You're never too young
to die, so don't expect
your soul to be able
to take this risk
hence take a close look
at the brightly lit words,
and follow it till
the end of this road,
for you can never know,
when death calls you home.

Lets' all end our lives
peacefully, with our
limps all intact.
Lets' not wonder about
our existence and
just live the life
we are all given,
for there's a purpose,
whether we know it or not.
~Ger.

Oh yes, i forgot to add an a/n: ai kia si just means have to be scared of death.

Simple Chemistry

Negative is where sit
by each other in order,
shivering slightly.

Zero is where they begin,
to flow out and around,
in a puddle round their origin.


A Hundred is where
they disperse into the air,
forming energized free bodies.

Such is the particle model
of the states of matter,
have you remembered them?
~Ger.

( Theme: Fluid)

>> Window Grills

Teacher No More

Three years
of being under you,
and I'd always been in this belief,
that you're the best teacher ever,
because you gave us breaks
and showed us where w were weak,
bringing us through every nit-grit detail
of every single skill and notes,
marking, bolding, highlighting,
everything that will help us
in future tests and examinations,
hoping that we will emerge the top...

Yet it's only today that
you're true colour is revealed.
[ or is it just my dellusion?]
You're cold and mean to
those who'd missed the first train
but still held on to their faith.
You don't give second chances
to those who wake slightly later,
you only accept those who
grabbed the first opportunity,
and pushed them to excellence,
leaving the rest to drown in
the sea of vexing sweat and tears.

You may not owe us anything,
but you've definitely owed your job
more than the world.
For you've failed your duty
as a guiding light of hope.
But more importantly,
you've defeated the purpose
of yourself being
a teacher.
~Ger.

OMG, I felt like it's been ages since I've been on here, first there are busy schedules, plus I'm over with my exams! I've been studying like hell for the past few days, phew! There goes my first term examination, now I just want to sit back and relax for a bit.

(Haemoglobin is floating in my head)

Ai Kia si
-A good 'welcome back' poem for me! I love this one in particular, gosh, it seems to me that it has been so long since I've read any of your poems and I do kinda missed it, so one word, awesomeness. The title is a mystery for those who don't understand it, so there, a point for the brilliant title ( as choosing titles is your specialty, hehe) I just recently lost a friend, so this poem really made me reflect back on embracing death, as much as it is a natural process, I could never bring myself to think anywhere near towards the end of life, 'when death calls you home.' <<< this is an eerie, yet so true, and so meaningful line.

Standing Oviation! I would grade this A++ , and no, I don't say it to only flatter you, haha:)

*~Dreamer~* wrote:

Teacher No More

Three years
of being under you,
and I'd always been in this belief,
that you're the best teacher ever,
because you gave us breaks
and showed us where w were weak,
bringing us through every nit-grit detail
of every single skill and notes,
marking, bolding, highlighting,
everything that will help us
in future tests and examinations,
hoping that we will emerge the top...

Yet it's only today that
you're true colour is revealed.
[ or is it just my dellusion?]
You're cold and mean to
those who'd missed the first train
but still held on to their faith.
You don't give second chances
to those who wake slightly later,
you only accept those who
grabbed the first opportunity,
and pushed them to excellence,
leaving the rest to drown in
the sea of vexing sweat and tears.

You may not owe us anything,
but you've definitely owed your job
more than the world.
For you've failed your duty
as a guiding light of hope.
But more importantly,
you've defeated the purpose
of yourself being
a teacher.
~Ger.

It's rare for me to read a poem 'dedicated' to the teachers, especially in this form, but I appreciate that, and the effort you took to write this poem. It's a refreshing change but I still like Ai Kai si better.

Now, imo, Beloved Mentor is way better than the first one, I don't know why but I just liked it better, it sounded more....relatable? LOL, I don't know how to phrase this, XD